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anybody else struggle with worrying way too much?
Journal Entry #3
WORRY:1. to be or cause to be anxious or uneasy, especially about something uncertain or potentially dangerous 2. To disturb the peace of mind of; bother
FEAR: 1. A feeling of agitation and anxiety caused by the presence or imminence of danger. 2. A state or condition marked by this feeling: living in fear.
This one is a long one so grab a hot tea, a chocolate bar and get ready. Let the transparency begin..
Fear and worry. What an awful invention. Two things I use to struggle with and still to this day have to to work through.
For many of you, you may already know this but.. 2012 started really rough for me and my family. It allowed me to miss 2011 even more because it was a nicer year.
My mom received bad news from the doctor and shortly after that she had passed out at Macaroni grill causing herself to hit her head on the concrete floor waking up a major concussion, a giant knot on her head, and being rushed to the hospital.
My 82 year old grandma who is so incredibly dear to my heart and sharp as a really sharp knife was in a car accident that caused her to break 7 ribs, broke her ankle, foot, and displaced her knee cap. She had to spend weeks in the hospital - weeks in the rehabilitation center and once she was out she was remitted for pneumonia. During that time my great uncle passed away from the horrid illness…cancer.
I have two sisters and they both are my best friends. I can literally talk to them about anything and during this time one of my best friends moved to Colorado. Though, I am so happy for her to start a new life with her husband as they open up a practice, it was so hard to say bye to her especially during this rough patch. I just wanted to keep hugging her and not watch her truck and trailer drive away.
My Spanish teacher who I had known for 7 years and taught me for 4 years passed away. He was such an incredible man. He gave me words of advice that money can not buy and that is “believe half of what you see and none of what you here”.
Seeing my mom in the ER, my grandma all bruised and in pain in the hospital for weeks and in the most depressing rehabilitation center ever, knowing the passing of my great uncle and the effect it had on my family, regretting how I did a horrible job on staying in touch with Dr. Fitch, and watching my sisters trailer drive away was hard. With in a month and a half, a simple call to my phone made me crawl. I was worried and fearful for what kind of news I would hear on the other end. Questions of “I know things happen for a reason but why all at once?” There is no doubt I dealt with anxiety and the emotions of death. I dealt with stomach aches, headaches, and tears. I’d like to think its only the first of the year but so much has happened in 2 months that I was really worried on what the next 10 months would be like. I knew my family and I were experiencing this for a reason. I learned the value of family, friendships, grace, peace, strength, faith, life, death, worry, fear, healing, and never ending love.
If you are going through anxiety or worry here are 4 little things that worked for me and may work for you.
#1. If you pray— I prayed and journaled for peace every single day. Every single moment I felt it creeping and the moment I prayed it was the moment I felt the rush of peace flood through my heart and mind.
#2. If you don’t pray— Journaling. “Journaling is one of the easiest and most powerful ways to accelerate your personal development. By getting your thoughts out of your head and putting them down in writing, you gain insights you’d otherwise never see.” Steve Pavlina did a post on journaling and I totally 100% believe that.
#3. Distractions— It was so important for me to stay productive. If I stayed productive it distracted my mind from wandering and thinking the worst case scenarios. Whether it was listening to empowering music while working, hanging out with friends, having a girls night, going to see movies, frozen yogurt dates, sketching until you fill up the whole page, cleaning the house over and over and over again, doing crafts (I did DIY Valentines Day cards), visited The High Museum of Art, bake cookies, more frozen yogurt dates, get a tattoo haha, and rearrange your living room are just some of the few that helped me keep my mind active.
#4 Healing— Sometimes when you have experienced moments that hurt or situations that cause fear, coping with what has happened is so important. It’s natural to want to forget rather than cope. Some say “You can’t change what has happened so why think about it” and that is totally true. You can’t change what has happened but you still need to deal and process what you are feeling. I had to face my fears. I asked myself “if X happened how would I want to handle it?” I didn’t want to ignore or mask the problems I had to confront them and work through it.
I learn through trial and error. I definitely don’t think I have all the answers when dealing with anxiety but these were some things that helped me :)
I have worked on these three songs for the past few months and I am ready for them to be out and in peoples hands… They are done.. they are mastered… and I have no clue what is holding me back on releasing them. I need to get with it and just release em!
love my sisters.
Everyone has someone in their life that encourages them.. and everyone is an encourager to someone in their life. Philip and Anna are HUGE encouragers to our lives. Philip and Anna came to us with an idea to make the month of May a holiday for So Worth Loving. They had the phrase “May You Be ____.” on their minds for the month of may. They gave us an idea and from there Jared built the site in 3 days and we launched it!
We are so thankful for them for how encouraging they are to us. We want the whole world to know about them. They are not just amazing photographers with impecable style but incredible people.
Check out their post they did for May You Be. “The world needs you.” May You Be Cherished.
Last night I wore a dress with semi clean hair, and wore daisy perfume… I felt like a lady..
My pink haired pixie.
Jared’s cousin Courtney came into town last week and stayed with us for 6 days. She put up with our air mattress filled apartment, boxes everywhere, and us having to work. Though when packing or working wasn’t taking place we were taking her to some of the most fun restaurants in Atlanta, staying the night where we were moving for one night, and if we weren’t watching the entire season of new girl, sleeping, having cds thrown at us by a rapper, eating yogurt with deep spoons or just plain eating- she was coloring my hair and cutting Jared’s hair. Our goal was to make her have so much fun she would have no choice but to move to the ATL.
There is only one Courtney in this world and her smile radiates joy and laughter. As cheesy as that may sound I know that she is going to change and impact so many peoples lives by the way she interacts with them and how her smile literally lights up a room. Being a hair dresser in Minnesota her cute accent filled our half empty apartment with hysterical laughter and I am so thankful I married into a family that has amazing and inspiring people like her.
Courtney come back to Georgia and make it rain foils and eat yogurt with soup spoons with me again!
If there is one thing that I’d hope to help with would be bringing awareness to bad and unsafe products and bring to light all the awesome organic and safe ones I am using. Now sometimes it’s hard to go all natural.. Like Hair Color.. man who knows what is in the dye I use.. but I hope by eliminating all the other stuff.. it won’t be AS bad for me… I hope…
I understand not wanting to purchase organic products because they are expensive, but I am all for quality over quantity. After many years of trying out tons of different types of products- I have found some gems!
A few people have messaged me and asked “what organic products do I use”- SO I thought I would do a blog post on it! :) I am no expert and these are just things I have found with in research.
Note to self: Just cause it says Natural or Organic doesn’t mean SQUAT! You’ve got to get familiar with ingredients and not trust the marketing. "The hitch is, organic skin-care products aren’t necessarily pesticide- or chemical-free, despite what their name suggests. The word organic on a bottle might simply mean a product was made with "organic material" like plants or minerals — or it might mean nothing at all. Many companies are happy to exploit customers’ growing interest in natural skin care by misleading them into buying a product based on a faulty organic claim." -
Products I use:
Lotions and Body Wash: Natures Gate (took me a while to found an awesome lotion that was safe and not watery. I love too that they have a natural brozer that doesn’t contain bad chemicals.
Make Up: Alima Pure (Here was a make up review I did on them.. but pretty much in love with them and their line. I especially like them because they don’t have SPF in them. I want the choice to wear SPF and recent studies have shown that too much SPF is actually bad for our bodies..)
Mascara: Physicians Formula Organic Mascara and L’oreal Bare Naturale Mineral Mascara (Mascara is a hard make-up to find that is completely organic but here are two that we have found, worn and liked that are inexpensive and at least 80% organic.)
Face Wash: Say Yes To Carrots (I love this stuff!! Not only did they start as small company but you can surprisingly find it at Target! Their shampoo, facewash, lotion, face wipes, and eye lotion are so gentle and they have different kinds depending on the skin type.)
List of top 9 toxic ingredients that are in most products that we put on our skin:
1. Lead- A neurotoxin that can accumulate in the body over time. Found in lipsticks, hair dyes, hair care, etc. Often listed as lead and lead acetate.
2. Mercury- Known to cause damage to the brain and diminish function. Found in mascaras, etc. Often listed as mercury, thimerosol, mercuric oxide, phenyl mercuric acetate, and phenyl mercuric benzoate.
3. Phthalates- These tiny plasticizers can cause infertility, feminization of baby boys and sperm damage. Found in “fragrance,” nail polish, nail treatment, etc. Often listed as phthalate, dibutyl phthalate and diethyl phthalate. These tricky toxins can legally be left out of ingredient list, encompassed under “fragrance.” So when buying a product that does not specify fragrance as being naturally derived, I suggest contacting the company.
4. Hydroquinone- This skin bleaching ingredient can cause ochronosis, an irreversible skin condition causing black and black raised bumps on the skin. Found in skin lighteners, anti-agers, hair color/bleach, SPF products, concealer, acne treatments, astringent/toners, etc.Often listed as hydroquinone.
5. Petroleum- Byproducts of this non-renewable, industrial resource still make their way into cosmetic products despite the high-incidence of cancer causing contaminants. Found in facial cleansers, moisturizers, facial treatments, styling products, eye make-up, soap, anti-perspirants, concealer, sunscreens, etc. Often listed as petroleum, petrolatum, petroleum distillates, mineral oil, mineral spirits, unspecified waxes and paraffins.
6. Parabens- These estrogen-mimicers have been found in breast tumors, linked to breast cancer and known tocause hormonal activity in the body. Found in deodorants, lotions, eye shadows, shampoos, facial cleansers, body washes, facial moisturizers, etc. Often listed as methylparaben, ethylparaben, propylparaben, butylparaben, isobutylparaben, (I pretty much avoid anything ending in “paraben”).
7. Sodium Lauryl Sulfates- These commonly found chemicals have been shown to cause severe changes to the skin, though studies linking them to cancer are still debatable. Found in toothpastes, shampoos, facial cleansers, body wash, acne treatment, exfoliants, moisturizers, hair color/bleach, etc. Often listed as sodium lauryl sulfate, sodium dodecyl sulfate, sulfuric acid, monodecyl ester and monododecyl ester.
8. Formaldehyde - This awful enbalmer is not just awful smelling, it is also known to cause respiratory irritation as well as cancercancer. Found in nail polish, baby soaps, eye lash adhesives, hair products, sunscreens, etc. Often listed as formaldehyde, formalin, formic aldehyde, Merthaldehyde, methanal, methyl aldehyde, oxomethane, oxymethylene.
9. Coal Tar- A known carcinogen that still makes its way in to beauty products used daily.Found in shampoo, skintreatment, anti-redness creams, bath oils, conditioners, bath salts, bath soaks, etc. Often listed as coal, tar and coal tar solution.
My hair has a mind of its own.. I’ve not had my hair colored in probably 3 1/2 months which means my roots are LONG which means my hair doesn’t stick up because there is no texture which means…. I play with my hair in photobooth because it is floppy… haha
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction. — Albert Einstein
the last day of our vaca… aka the day i got the most burntttt!!
A much needed break from the world with some amazing people. Jared and I have not had a vacation in what feels like forever and man did we need one to get rejuvinated.
We got to share our vacation with Anna and Phillip. They are wedding photographers and their work is amazing and one of a kind. Their work is best described as whimsy, lovely, chic and reminds me of Anthropologie or Free People but what makes them stand apart from so many others would be that their hearts are even more incredible.
Our week involved sitting on the couch, sitting on the beach, sitting in a coffee shop, sitting while eating crab legs, sitting by the pool, sitting in the hot tub, sitting while watching movies, sitting on the porch, and Phillip baking cookies and brownies!
You know you’ve had a blast when you spend an entire week with them and then miss them when you get back home.
Check them out! ThreePennies.com